Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone; but, as a result, I’ve learned to lean on my faith, develop a stronger relationship with God, and become a better person.  I’ve also learned to get a better handle on what’s important in life – my life – and what I shouldn’t fret about.  If I stay busy and focus positively on the task at hand, whether it’s at the office, home, anywhere or with anyone, then I don’t have time to allow negative thoughts to enter my mind.  This is how we should approach life.  It took me two years and over 300 dialysis sessions to figure this out, and as I’m still learning, this is one of many lessons I will not forget.

There are a couple more sections that I’ve written to give you an idea of what happened to me, and to clarify why I need a kidney.  I greatly appreciate you taking the time read my web page and allowing me to share this part of my life with you.  I also hope you will gain some insight which will enable you to be more aware and informed.

Friday, December 02, 2005 I took the day off of work to do some Christmas shopping and follow-up with my doctor about a stuffy nose and persistent cough.  At the doctor’s office they took my blood pressure, as usual, but noted that it was unusually high.  As a result, they took some blood and urine to run tests on.

*Note: My sister, Liz, thinks this paragraph should be read with the voice of Joey Greco from ‘Cheaters’!  *Later that same evening, at 10:15, I received a phone call from a nurse who asked me to go to the ER as soon as possible, due to some ‘numbers being off’ in the tests they ran on my blood and urine.  Frightened at the ambiguity and bareness of this late evening phone call, my brother took me to the ER per the nurse’s instructions.

At the ER my blood pressure was 215/150.  I was told that I should have a screaming headache and feel crummy, but physically I felt fine and just wanted to return home.  The following day I was diagnosed with End-Stage Renal Failure and was to start dialysis immediately, and to begin a renal diet.  Oh, and I also had a cold!  The disease that I was diagnosed with is called Focal Sclerosis – a scarring of the kidneys.  Unfortunately, the doctors know more about what Focal Sclerosis isn’t, than they know what it is.  They know that it’s not contagious, that it’s not environmental, and that it’s not genetic.  Basically, it’s a ‘hit-or-miss’ disease.  That Sunday my neck was ‘tapped’ and I had my first dialysis session.  On Monday a catheter was inserted into my chest and would be a part of me for the following year.  This catheter leads from my heart and is split into two tubes – one leading blood out of me into the dialysis machine to be cleansed, and the other leading clean blood back into me.  I did have an incident where one morning the catheter literally fell out of my chest and hit the floor and had to be replaced, and another where my new catheter broke a week after being replaced.  It doesn’t take much more that an exposed hole in your chest to make you stop in your tracks and pray.  These catheters are also highly susceptible to infections, so eventually I had to have an access (fistula) placed in my left arm.  A fistula connects a vein to an artery to create a very strong loop of blood flow.  I have two 14-gauge needles that get stuck into my arm at each dialysis; functioning similarly to the two catheter tubes but with better clearance.

Unfortunately, there are days when dialysis takes its toll on me both physically and emotionally.  During, and after, a dialysis treatment I tend to feel exhausted and worn out.  The treatment itself is painless, but considering every square inch of your body flows with blood, the transformation of toxic blood to clean blood during three hours and fifteen minutes weakens you and beats you up.  You have to imagine that blood from every organ in every part of my body is changing.  Basically, what the dialysis machine does in a few hours a healthy kidney will do in a 24 hour period.  Keep it up for three times a week for a couple of years and the emotional stress will begin to set it.  At the end of a dialysis day I try my best to sleep it off and regain my strength, and I usually feel what I think is ‘good’ the following day.

As far as the renal diet is concerned – it sucks!  Since failing kidneys do not properly filter blood, certain minerals can build up in one’s body with harmful side effects.  Phosphorus, found in milk and milk-based products, has to be limited as an overabundance will begin to calcify bone and tissue.  To help reduce this accumulation of phosphorus, I have to chew a large chalky pill with each and every meal.  Potassium, which I’ve learned is found in just about everything, can lead to fluid building up around the heart, leading to heart failure.  Most of us are familiar with the ramifications of too much sodium, which is found in everything delicious!  Not only is too much sodium a major factor in causing high blood pressure, but it causes the body to retain fluid.  Lastly, fluid intake must be controlled as removing excess fluid is the primary function of the kidneys.

Contrary to what I thought would be an emotional challenge is my drive to, and from, the dialysis clinic.  I dislike not having structure in my life, especially in regards to my schedule.  The idea that I have to leave work to go to dialysis, and drive home for an evening of feeling exhausted aggravates me.  Regrettably, I’ve come to accept this as part of my routine.  Like I mentioned earlier, it’s at these times that I try my best to focus on what’s good in my life and keep positive thoughts.